We are home! In our NEW home.

You never really leave a place you love....Part of it you take with you leaving
a part of you behind

......my best friend gave me a picture framed that has that on it. I believe that now that I am here and settling in in Dallas Texas and trying my hardest to make it HOME. It is funny, I do feel like a part of me is missing...........and I can't find it. Don't get me wrong I am loving Dallas and all of the new friends in Christ that we are making. Our apartments are very nice except for a little ruckus at about 10:30 -2:00am thursday-saturday. Yeah, right outside of our apartment complex there are drag races every thursday, friday and saturday. They are pretty fun to watch I have to admit but can be very annoying when you are trying to sleep. We had to buy some fans to drown out the noise.

Meadow view church of Christ is more than we could have expected. I have to say that I was worried about the church and how it would measure up to the small church with in our church we had in grand ecore. But I have been pleasantly suprised by the measure of love for others and for Christ that has been shown here. We have currently been invited to begin a small group that will meet every thursday for prayer, praising the Lord and discussion over the bood "A Purpose Driven Life" I have to say I am very excited about this! I have missed the small group in natchitoches very much. I pray that this group will come together and grow strong in the Lord together, that much fruit will overflow from it, that we will each grow closer in our relationship to God, and that we will all be strengthened from eachother through Christ.

Well, I guess that is all for now it is late and I have to get up early to start my day tomarrow. I started homeschooling my Eli Monday so I need to be fully refreshed and replenished for another blessed day of homeschooling and home managment. Be Blessed my friends!
Joyfully Yours, Kelli

Well...........we are almost done. Tomarrow we head out of Old Natchitoches. I have to say that I am getting a little nervous, this is my first big move with my family. Saturday is going to be a huge mixture of emotions. I have lived here in Natchitoches for almost 6 years and in Louisiana for almost 13 so it is going to be sad to leave. I go get the U-haul at 10:00 and am going to bring it back here to load it up. I hope to load it up before Rick gets home but that may not happen. Eli and Kai and going to their Mama's and Bebe's house this afternoon. They will have a blast. Tonight if I get all that I need to get done done we will have singing and prayer with our friends here for the last time. I am really going to miss that........praising God with our wonderful church family. They are all so amazing. Well, I guess the next post I do will be in Dallas.......I am not sure when but hopefully soon. Wish us luck!

Moving is not fun. I am tired. It is 10:08 and I have been up and packing since 6:30 this morning. All I want to do right now is go lay my head on my soft comfy pillow and drift off to la la land but no I can't I have to keep pushing myself through this sleepiness. Packing box after box, labeling box after box, picking up box after box, running out of boxes and having to go find more boxes, taping boxes.............when we are finished I am not going to want to see another box again! Tape, black marker, and boxes oh my! Sorry about that terrible line........I am just so tired. Well, I guess I better get back to the..................BOXES. Be blessed.










Well..............at least they are having fun with the boxes!

Romans 7:15-23 For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am carnal, sold under sin. For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do. If, then, I do what I will not to do, I agree with the law that it is good. But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find. For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice. Now if I do what I will not to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man. But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.

As a Christian in my sin I feel absent as if I were not even really there. It happens and I am present in mind but absent in heart. I hate what I am doing but continue to wallow in it and I do not even understand why it is that I am doing it. In verse .............it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me." Sin that makes its home in me or that lingers around in me, it comes in me and lingers around and starts making itself comfortable on a couch of misery and a foot stool of pain........and it delights with a glass of wine smugly and boastful in its victory over me. And in here it is a battle a fierce battle, fighting in a raging ruthless war and I can't win fighting by myself for I possess no power of my own to beat it. In me there is a new creation in Christ that is living in a sinful fallen body. The flesh is not who I am and yes it will pass away but it is the new me that is the real person inside......the inward being that desires to do good. When sin dwells in me it is not because I desire it, the impulse for my sin does not come from who I am in Christ but from the pull of my flesh going against my will.

24 O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?

25 I thank God; through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, with the mind I myself serve the law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin.

Oh, how I am abundantly, considerably, substantially, infinitely, highly, vastly and exceedingly thankful to God. There are no words that could measure the vast amount of gratitude that I have in my heart for the life through His son Jesus Christ that He has given to me. It kills me to think of how I fall so often to my flesh. I detest intensely with in my soul the pull of the flesh and the reign that it has over me and all Christians. Although, I know that we should be thankful for this battle but it is hard for we desire with all of our being as a means to obey and love our God to do what is right and good and to bring Glory to Him. But when we fail we weep loudly inside for we do NOT what we want to do but the very thing that we HATE. We the inward new man that Christ made desires and rejoices in good and hates sin but our nature which we live in delights in and rejoices in the dark holes of sin that we fall in daily or jump in as John Piper would say. Thankfully only to Christ we are not held captive to our nature.

I was thinking yesterday in church right before we were going to take the Lords supper about Jesus and the pain he went through. I came to tears thinking about how He carried that cross with agony and humility up to calvary for me and my sins. The first nail that was pierced in his hand was for me and my sin, the second nail that pierced His skin was for me and my sin, the spear that went through his side was for me and my sin, the exscruitiating pain He went through hanging on that cross on that day in front of the world was for me and my sin. I feel so unworthy for the blood that was shed and I am unworthy, but because He loved me He did this for me so that I would not be held captive to my nature. Although there are times that I forget that I am not held captive to it I pray that I will remember Him and His love for me and the sacrifice and tremendous amount of pain he went through for me.

So how are we fighting our nature that enevitabley will continue to pull on us as long as we have breath of life in us? When the flesh pulls with its dark and sweaty hands what are we going to do? How are we going to fight it off……alone with our own weapons of righteousness………do we have any? No, we do not and that is what I feel Paul is saying. Alone we can not beat our nature we need with great desperation our Lord to give us the weapons and the strength to fight the battle that is waging in us.

The Armor of God

Ephesians 6:10-18
10Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. 12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

Imagine yourself for a moment standing desolate in Africa and surrounded by a vast amount of flat land. It is very hot and you notice that you are naked and vulnerable with nothing you are alone in this place and then you feel a hot and powerful breath of air blow on your neck, you turn to find yourself face to face with a massive dominant male lion. You are staring straight into his eyes and in them you see no mercy only death, you become frightened to the depths of your soul. What are you going to do here……this beast is awaiting to devour you and you have nothing to fight back with.






Isn’t that what we are doing with sin! We can not fight sin if we try to do it alone with no help from God. Ridiculous we are naked in from of a ferocious lion just waiting to be devoured! But with the full armor of God we will be able to beat this beast it will be a battle but he will not devour us for our Lord is our strength and our Sword! We must hide his Word in our hearts and mind where we must fight this battle. Quit trying to fight it on your own………YOU CAN’T DO IT! You do not possess the power to fight this evil only God can possess you with the amount of power to persevere and beat the pull of your flesh the evil that dwells in you. So put on your belt, your breastplate, shield, helmet and your sword and fight with the Lord by your side.

The reason I have spoken of this is just that lately I have felt a battle raging in me like never before. I have never felt the battle in me like I did this past week. And the realization that I was trying to fight it off by myself was hopeless and it just was a continuous circle that I went in for a whole week getting no where. Why because I did not fight it with the Armor of God. I was naked and waiting to be devoured. Oh God forgive me a sinner, guide me Lord to keep my eyes on you always and to notlet the grips of darkness overtake me even for a moment, may every moment of my life not be wasted in sin but focused on Your glory.

ONE SECOND LIFE IS HAPPENING AND THE NEXT YOU ARE REFLECTING ON IT. TIME, IT GOES BY SO FAST. SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE SOMEONE PUSHED FASTFORWARD TO THE NEXT CHAPTER OF MY LIFE. SECONDS GO BY SECOND AFTER SECOND AND THEY TURN INTO MINUTES AND THEN HOURS AND DAYS, MONTHS, YEARS AND SO FORTH AND LATELY I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO JUST SIT IN THE SECONDS OF MY MINUTES OR IN THE MINUTES OF MY HOURS OR EVEN IN THE HOURS OF MY DAYS. I AM THE ONE WHO HAS PUSHED FAST FORWARD ON MY LIFE. WHY AM I IN SUCH A HURRY TO GET STUFF DONE. EVERYDAY IS OVER BEFORE I EVEN REALLY KNOW IT. I GET UP IN THE MORNING AND IT FEELS LIKE A MILISECOND THAT I AM RUSHING TO PUT THE KIDDOS TO BED. WHY? YESTERDAY SEEMS LIKE IT JUST HAPPENED. I SIT AND LOOK AT MY BOYS AND AM IN SHOCK WHEN I THINK ABOUT HOW OLD THEY ARE 5 AND 1. 5 I THINK WHAT! WHERE IN THE WORLD DID THE TIME GO WHAT HAPPENED HE WAS JUST 1 ABOUT A YEAR AGO. AND 1 HE WAS JUST BORN! HERE WE ARE MOVING AND CHANGING OUR LIVES AND I AM NOT EVEN SURE WHAT HAPPENED YESTERDAY WAS REALLY YESTERDAY. RICK AND I HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR ALMOST 5 YEARS AND BEEN TOGETHER 6 YEARS, NOW THAT SEEMS AT TIMES TO BE MORE LIKE 15 OR SO YEARS HA HA BUT TODAY IT SURE FEELS LIKE WE JUST MET AT THAT AUCTION AT NORTHWESTERN. I GUESS YOU CAN TELL THAT I AM PONDERING AT MY LIFE AND FEELING A LITTLE GUILTY FOR NOT STOPPING TO TAKE A BREATHER EVERY NOW AND THEN. FOR NOT PUSHING PAUSE ON MY RECORDING LIFE. MOMENTS ARE GOING BY WELL EVERY MOMENT.....THERE WENT ONE .....AND I AM JUST LETTING THEM GO BY WITH OUT DWELLING IN THEM AND SOAKING THEM UP. WHAT A WASTE OF TIME. TODAY IS GOING TO BE DIFFERENT..........FOR THERE WILL BE MANY PAUSED MOMENTS.

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. ~Matthew 6:34

Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.~James 4:13-14

Time is what we want most, but what we use worst. ~William Penn

Live in and for today and live in it and for it for Christ. Don't suck the joy out of today out of this moment, out of this hour by thinking about anything else for to long. Take the time to push the pause button or the slow motion button for a while and soak up the seconds of the minutes. We are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes so live in today not in the past or the futurel leave all that to Christ He has it undercontrol. Don't wast these precious moments in worry, guilt, doubt, or in rushing through it and don't whatever you do waste it by not having Christ be your foundation for the moment. That will not only suck the joy out of the moment but it will totally destroy it. Anything not done in and for Christ is a horrible waste. That I am guilty of but pray that I will not forget how to live in this moment. I have not been trusting God with my time and have allowed my planning and guilt rule over each moment and they have been wasted. Wasted because I have not handed over my past to him or given him my future, to an extent but not completely I am still hanging on to them. Well, I am letting go and am ready to immerse myself in today. Peace be with you and I pray that you also will give your past and future to God and live in the present for God.

We just don't know do we? What the day may bring? There is nothing that we can do that will fully prepare us for tomarrow for we know not the exact happenings that are going to be. We usually do have an idea but not always, and I sat wondering today what makes one day better or worse that yesterday or tomorrow? I often wonder if this same circumstance or situation that happened today had happened yesterday would it be the same outcome or would it be better or worse. Is it the circumstances and situations or our attittudes towards them? In some cases I think no matter what today would have been a bad day and other cases I say I wish this would have happened yesterday. Do our attitudes affect our circumstances or vice versa? Which is it....I guess it would be both. So can everyday be a good day? Is it ultimitately up to us and the choice of having a good attitude or a bad one determine the day's outcome? I know that there are exceptions as in most cases but in just a normal day we have the power to overcome bad circumstances with our attitudes! Wow, what a revelation........I know that we all already knew this but it is something that is easly looked past and forgotten. We often allow, I think, our circumstances to rule our attitudes. The thing that we forget is that we control our attitudes not the circumstances. We can't always control the circumstances that come into our days but and even though it is extremely difficult at times we do have control over our own attitudes by conrolling our thoughts. For me there are times when I do feel as though I do not have control of them but that is a lie that I am told so that my oppressor can have victory over me and steal God's glory. I say all of this because last night I went to bed with this feeling of determination that today was going to be an awesome productive day balanced with playing with my two boys and I knew just how everything was going to go. Well, there were different plans instore for me when I woke up and the day went way off of the course that I had set for it. It was for me a bad day because I lost control of my emotions and attitudes and allowed the situations and circumstance to rule them. I fell into the lie and proceeded in it pretty much all day. And mid-point into the day I got to thinking about how the day had taken such a drastic turn from how I had thought it was going to go. Isn't this the way we so often treat God and the plans that He has for us? We get a bad attitude because we don't like the way His plans go because well......they were not our own. We can miss so much if we think this way. I missed so many things in today just because of my attitude.........had it been a grateful, content, and optimistic one I might have seen so much more around me and I could have brought so much more glory to God, but all I can do now is learn learn learn and grow from it................I hope that I do not forget this lesson on the power that I possess behind the circumstances in my life and in the plans that God has for me.....my thoughts.